June 9, 2021
I Should Have Prayed This Pray Last Week: A Prayer
O Lord, I should have prayed this prayer last week
but I couldn’t,
because
I didn’t know
how to pray it,
how to say it,
how to convey it,
pray, say, convey
what I was feeling.
Really
all I could do
was to keep asking
what the governor of California asked and
millions of others
along with him:
What is going on in America?
What is the matter with us?
What is happening to us?
Of course,
he put it stronger than that,
and the truth is,
I put it even stronger,
and I have a feeling that
you, Lord,
put it stronger still,
your righteous wrath
(Don’t hear much about that anymore),
your righteous wrath
(Can’t we just stick with grace and mercy?),
your righteous wrath
(Sorry, it’s part of love – ask any parent),
burning hot
at the sight of
what you see
in this nation
that loves to claim
that it is
a Christian nation,
and what you see is
violence unending,
killing unending,
evil unending,
San Jose, Miami, Atlanta, and more,
even kids shooting it out with police
(It was like playing a video game, they said);
and if that isn’t enough,
flight attendants punched,
TSA agents pummeled,
fights on flights
(some real men out there and don’t forget the
ladies landing left hooks).
What is going on in America?
What is the matter with us?
What is happening to us?
And Lord, it is us,
it is America,
it is what we have become.
And do you know what my greatest fear is, Lord?
That for far too many in our culture
(even Christians, especially Christians),
for far too many
good is boring
bad is fun,
violence is thrilling,
evil a regular riot,
cruelty a laugh a minute,
meanness the new honesty,
entertainment everything,
being kind, nice, gracious, for losers.
But my fear is also
there’s more to it:
bitterness (It’s not fair!)
marrying
resentment (Why should they get all the breaks?)
fathering
anger (No one is going to treat me like that!)
birthing
violence (I’ll show you!)
mothering
grief (Why?!)
begetting
bitterness
marrying
resentment
fathering
anger
birthing
violence
mothering
grief…
a sad spiral spiraling
out of control.
Please tell me I’m wrong, Lord,
because if this is why,
then there is a sickness
at the heart of our culture,
and the only way
to describe
what’s going on,
what’s the matter,
what’s happening,
is to use the words
sick
sickening,
sickness of soul.
O Lord, there are days when I wonder why you don’t just
give up on the whole show
and start over
like you once did,
except
the last time
didn’t work out very well
and this time
wouldn’t work out any better than that time
just like it didn’t work out very well at the beginning of time,
because the problem is
us,
and we know it,
just as we know
the solution must be
us.
And so, Lord, our only hope is that you would
not give up on us,
but
come down hard on us
with wounding, healing, loving judgement,
until at last,
we obey your way,
refuse to follow culture’s way,
live a different way,
choosing to let go of our bitterness and resentment and anger and
attraction to violence,
being nice even if we come in last,
being kind even if it means being a loser,
being loving even if it means being laughed at.
Grant us the courage, Lord, to actually be
Christian
among Christians who often don’t seem very Christian
in a nation
that is everything but
Christian.
And we pray, O Lord, once again for
those families and friends grieving because of what violence has done;
those risking themselves protecting us from violence;
those battling illness or disease;
those facing scary treatments or procedures;
those struggling emotionally;
those who are torn by war, seeking refuge, homeless or hungry;
those who have no one to pray for them.
Comfort, heal, be with, strengthen, give them hope!
O Lord, help us to bring the day when
good is good,
bad is bad,
mean is mean,
cruelty is cruel,
violence is vile,
evil is evil,
and Christians are actually Christian,
so that
what will be going on in America will be solutions, and
what was the matter with us will be no more, and
what will be happening will be
hope
and
joy!
Amen.